Monday, December 10, 2012

どうしょもない

Definitely one of my favorite expressions in Japanese, it perfectly encompasses the uselessness of trying to change/help a situation/person.

Since I am mostly aquainted with people who have a strong interest in broadening their experiences, learning new things or taking on new challenges, I am not sure what to make of those few who drift along and complain without trying to fix their situation.

Conversation this Sunday:
X-chan: 'Omg I am so bored... what am I supposed to do? Is it like this for all people who work?'
Me: 'You could take some kind of fun class? Yoga is great and not too expensive'
X-chan: 'But that costs money'
Me: 'Go for a run or a walk?'
X-chan: 'But it is sunny out, I might get burned'
Me: 'Well, if you want to make more money and are bored, why not get an extra job one day per weekend?'
X-chan: 'Mendokusai...'

Okay, I get it, you don't actually want a solution, how unfeminine of me to not get that...

And every time I am preparing to go off on a trip all I hear is 'iinaaa, I want to go somewhere toooo'.
Then go! But no, it always goes back to 'my boyfriend doesn't wanna' (as if it is impossible to travel with friends or *gasp* by yourself) or 'you make more money than me' (false, actually you make more, I just manage it better).

If you want to have fun, you need to be proactive about it. Admittedly I may have taken it a bit far, with running AND koto AND yoga AND freelancing AND traveling, along with the usual nomikai and other stuff that pops up. I would love to take drawing classes, and am thinking of taking a course in real estate too. This kind of lifestyle may be busy but hell, you meet a lot of people and have a lot of fun!

I have also recently been dealing with several clients who have little to no life outside of work. Some say they play a sport or do an activity once a month. Others say that playing with their kids is their hobby (no, sorry, that is called 'good parenting'). Seriously? You only get to live once (unless you believe in reincarnation), and you are okay with spending that life at work?!

Such as waste... perhaps in their previous lives they were ants or other such industrious critters?

11 comments:

  1. Ah, you've described quite a few people I know in Tokyo, too! Always complaining, never doing! I do think the daily grind and commute squashes the motivation out of a lot of people. It's unfortunate that work-life balance seems to be a rare concept here! My most active friends are ladies in their 50's and 60's! With their kids moved out, they're into music, dance, hiking, weekends away with their mates, gourmet hunting... I'm in awe of their energy! Actually, I feel a little sympathy for your friend about the boyfriend - I once had one of those grumpy types that didn't want to do anything, but got bitchy if I went without him. Solution: dump him! Hope your friend wises up soon!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hear hear for work/life balance! I am so grateful that my boss believes in it!

      As for the boyfriend, it seems he doesn't mind, SHE is the one who only wants to travel with him.....

      Delete
  2. I also have too many hobbies and agree that if you want to have a fun and interesting life, you have to take the initiative and do things yourself!

    But I also have 2 dead-end jobs, and completely understand the energy-sapping boredom! My hobbies do something to make up for it, but it is nonetheless depressing to spend most of the day doing something boring and unfulfilling. I think it's even worse when one has many interests that could be otherwise furthered with that time. I often think that if my employment were more challenging and fulfilling, I wouldn't need so many hobbies to be happy.

    - Jessica

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I see your point, but at the same time I feel that having your work be what defines you is not a great idea either.

      Delete
    2. Oh, I totally agree! Work/life balance (heck, study/life balance before that) is extremely important.

      Delete
  3. This is from a country where people often state their hobbies are eating, sleeping, and Internet browsing. :P

    When I was gainfully employed and healthy, I took martial arts, did a swimming class, brought used books on amazon, and a few other things. I wouldn't dream about saying that I was bored -- there's always something to do!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I totally think that eating is a hobby, as long as it is done with a purpose of discovery... maybe I should add that to my list?

      Delete
  4. I'm rather happy to have found a career that fits my definition of self, but goodness! We should all have more than one dimension!
    (Also, does the title here really translate as "No police"?)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree, and think it is awesome you have a job you really enjoy and matches your intrrests^ ^
      And the title better as 'it can't be helped'

      Delete
  5. People who complain about things and never do anything are so draining. And how sunburnt are you going to get going for a walk in Japan in winter!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Personally I just think it is an excuse. She wants other people to plan stuff FOR her... Tough luck!

      Delete