Weddings and engagements, that is. Over the last year and a half I have witnessed at least a dozen of these happy announcements, getting progressively more bewildered with each one. My parents tell me these things come in waves, but at the moment it feels more like a tsunami (in poor taste, I realize, but true nonetheless).
US, Japan and Europe, location doesn't seem to matter. Although, I must point out, the Italian contingent seems to have forgone the marriage part and gone on directly to producing numerous offspring (unusual, as Italy and Japan seem to constantly vie for first place in the shrinking population contest).
What sparked my desire to write about the subject is that one my Japanese friends recently invited me to her wedding, which will be my first wedding in this country. I hear reports of totally over-the-top shindigs, including cakes that spout mist,three dress changes and light-shows, so am throughly looking forward to it. The fact that the bride-to-be is also in her late 20's (and is totally down-to-earth) helps considerably as well.
But my question, and that of many people I know, remains: Whats the rush?!
Perhaps I am not the best person to comment, as Ms. Godzilla is still sore about being dumped not too long ago, due to lack of interest in having children (oh dear, speaking in the 3rd person, never a good sign...)
Is it wrong to want to run about and have a degree of freedom that marriage could curtail? Don't get me wrong, I am quite boringly monogamous when dating, and would like to find a partner, but it seems too soon... I have only started my first job, and the reality of the situation hasn't even sunk in yet.
Perhaps we (the bewildered) are less mature than we think? Are we too picky, or simply not lucky enough to have found Mr/Ms. Right as quickly as others?
I also don't really know what everyone's rush is. I feel like I'm lucky to be surrounded by friends who are equally as nonchalant and aloof about marriage as me, but every time I look at FB I see wedding pictures on some acquaintance from high school or college's page. It's a little tiring... but I agree that there is no need to rush into something so serious. :\
ReplyDeleteHi Indi, I know right?! There are some people who I think 'yup, these two are meant for each other', but there are so many other times I think 'whoaaa,aren't you still, like, 18?!'
ReplyDeleteI don't think it's an issue of maturity- at least I like to think it isn't- but a combination of pickiness, uncertainty about what exactly we're trying to do with our lives, and, at least on my end, an aversion to being unable to pick up and move across the country, or indeed across the world, without having to consult with someone else.
ReplyDeleteThen again, maybe we're just missing something :p
I kinda go between the logicking and the feeling excluded, depending on my mood.
Hi Mels!
ReplyDeleteI agree with you, I keep on going between the two feelings, it is very odd.
And the idea of having to consult about travel, hours or big life decisions (again, seeing how well that went with my previous beau) is more than a little scary.